Month: September 2016

Encouragement

To the Woman Who is Struggling to Love Her Body,

I saw you today.

I couldn’t help but notice how your eyes darted away from the mirror when you caught a glimpse of your reflection. My heart went out to you as your beautiful smile faded, replaced by a solemn look.

I may not know your story, but I’m certain that something has brought you to this point. Somewhere along the way a beautiful daughter was deeply wounded, left with an aching scar on her soul.

Perhaps you were hurt years ago by those kids in gym class, the ones who poked fun at you and chose you last because sports just didn’t come as naturally to you.

Maybe it began in your teens–you felt that the other girls were “prettier” than you: their skin was flawless, their hair and makeup perfect and their fashionable clothes hugged them in all of the right places. Then ever so slowly, you began to wish you were a little more of this and a little less of that.

Maybe you were happy with your body when you were younger, but after being blessed by motherhood, you hardly recognize your reflection. Your stomach, once flat and toned, is now a blubbery mess of stretch marks and saggy skin and you’re still fighting (unsuccessfully) to lose the “baby weight.” When you look around, you find that you often compare yourself to the other moms whose beauty is still radiant, and you’re secretly envious of them.

Your struggle to embrace your body might stem from something much deeper, much more intimate than simply body image: fertility issues and/or pregnancy complications. Whether you’ve battled infertility, miscarriage, pregnancy loss, infant loss, stillbirth or premature birth, this private pain haunts you every time you look in the mirror. One glance at your reflection sends you reeling and you cannot help but wonder why your body has failed you, why it just couldn’t do what it’s supposed to.

No matter the reason, please know that you’re not alone—I have experienced every single one of these heartaches, too. And, there are women everywhere, just like us, who feel the exact same way.

Sometimes we forget that we are our own worst critics; I’m meaner to myself than I would ever dare to be to anyone else.

I remember one particular day, when I was 20 years old, I just couldn’t tear my eyes away from the mirror. I stood there, slowly taking it all in: my make-up was flawless, my hair perfectly styled with a sparkling tiara on top, the white dress clung to me in all of the right places…and I still wasn’t satisfied. On the day that was supposed to be the happiest day of my life, when I was supposed to be “glowing” and “beautiful,” I chastised my reflection in the mirror. Now, when I look back at photos and reflect on that moment, I cannot understand what made me feel like an unattractive bride. Ten years have passed since then and, in that time, I’ve come to learn an important truth: “True beauty comes from within.”

It sounds cliché, I know, but it is the truth. It’s not what you are that makes you beautiful, but rather who you are. Our bodies are changing with each passing day, the beauty of our youth slowly fading as they do. There is something remarkable about this though; if it didn’t happen, we might miss out on knowing that outward beauty is not a true reflection of beauty.

Take a moment to think about the women in your life whom you hold dear. When these women come to my mind, beauty and age are not a factor in my love for them. I see what no mirror could ever capture: that their hearts are full of love, their smiles are illuminated by joy and their eyes twinkle with kindness.

I’m now working towards viewing myself in the same way that I see these women and on remembering that there’s so much more to me than just my appearance: I’m a wife, a mother, a sister, a friend, a cousin, a daughter, and (most importantly) a daughter of The Most-High King. The truth is, who I am has more significance than how I look.

When we begin to view ourselves through the eyes of The Heavenly Father and those who love us, our perspective changes. Doing so has taught me that you can learn to embrace your body when you first choose to love the soul inside of it.

As for you, I love you just the way you are.

Blessings,

Elise

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Devotions, Faith

The Way to Find Peace

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“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” 1 Peter 5:7 (NIV)

A mother always remembers the first time she sees her baby. All of my children are precious, but the day I met my youngest will forever pull on my heartstrings. I had to be wheeled up to the NICU to see him because he entered this world much too soon. As I sat by his isolette, marvelling at how tiny and perfect he was, his nurse gently placed her hand on my shoulder and whispered, “They say that having your baby in the NICU is like riding an emotional rollercoaster, full of highs and lows. Be prepared for good days and bad days. He has a long road ahead of him.”

Our first low arrived late one night when the hospital’s phone number illuminated our call display. My hands trembled as I answered the phone. I listened intently while the doctor explained that they were going to run some tests because they were concerned about my tiny baby. He promised to call us back as soon as they knew more, then said a hasty goodbye.

Several minutes passed. A knot formed in my stomach as worry clouded my heart. I stared at the phone and thought, Please ring! I don’t want to wait any longer! I want answers now!

Desperate and impatient, I turned to the internet for more information. However, my husband quickly interrupted my search by reminding me, “Elise, God’s got us this far. We don’t know what his plan is in all of this, but we know that he’s got this. Instead of searching the internet, let’s pray and look to Him.” Reluctantly, I closed my search. I knew that he was right, that the pesky knot in my stomach couldn’t be undone simply by learning more about my son’s condition. The only way I was going to find peace was to give my worries to God.

In 1 Peter 5:7 we are told, “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” These are simple, specific instructions given to us by our Heavenly Father. In the same way that children share their fears and concerns with their parents, so are we to bring our problems to Him. And yet, just as I quickly turned to the internet for answers, sometimes we are reluctant to go to God first.

Maybe we hesitate because we need to feel like we’re in control of a situation. Or, perhaps we believe that our circumstances are too big, or too insignificant, to give to God. Regardless of our reasons, God is always there. He stands with outstretched arms, patiently waiting for us to surrender all of our burdens to Him.

We only need to remember that he is.

Blessings,

Elise

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